Five Tactics For Dealing With Difficult People at Work

Dealing with difficult people at work is an unfortunate reality in most workplaces. These abrasive personalities negatively impact relationships, productivity, and psychological well-being with their disruptive behaviours. It’s important to think about how you can use your own communication skills and people skills to de-escalate situations and treat people with sensitivity.

Impact Factory knows that it’s not always easy to know what to say to difficult people and how to handle tense situations. Our guide is going to explore the characteristics of difficult people at work so you can spot problems early and mitigate issues before they escalate or spread. You’ll also learn to separate the person from the behaviour when tensions inevitably arise. With some finesse, you can train yourself to interact smoothly regardless of who you’re working with.

Key Takeaways:

–   It’s important to understand the different types of difficult behaviour that can arise.

–   Open communication is vital to address issues before they start.

–   Use empathy to understand where difficult behaviour is coming from.

–   Be calm to ensure a better solution.

–   Take care of your own mental health when dealing with difficult people.

Understanding Difficult People

Getting to the root of difficult behaviours is key to addressing them constructively. Tension, moodiness, criticism, and aggression often mask deeper issues that individuals struggle with internally or externally at work. Packaged alongside defiant body language or passive tones, these volatile reactions can disrupt already fragile workplace dynamics. Unpacking precisely what drives difficult personality traits provides context for why colleagues act abrasively or seem perpetually unreasonable.

Example:

A co-worker prone to exaggerated outbursts may have grown up in a household with similar volatility. Or someone averse to collaboration might struggle with vulnerability due to past failures on group projects. While these individuals may seem outright hostile or irrational at times from the outside, a patient and compassionate lens focused on understanding rather than judging goes a long way. It allows you to reframe difficult behaviours as cries for help rather than attacks.

With this context, you can respond calmly rather than reacting defensively when tensions inevitably escalate. Extending patience alongside accountability and support helps mitigate counterproductive workplace actions over time. And by recognising potential root causes, more positive connections become possible as understanding increases on both sides. But progress first requires contextualising where abrasive co-workers are coming from when personality clashes occur.

Impact On Workplace Relationships

Left unchecked, difficult co-workers breed toxicity that permeates workplace relationships, environment, and morale. Their disruptive communication styles, criticism of ideas, and tendency to shirk collaboration corrode team cohesion and trust over time. People walk on eggshells around these volatile personalities, affecting information sharing, engagement, and productivity.

Example:

A detail-oriented manager prone to micromanagement can create a culture of fear in his team. People grow anxious presenting new ideas or projects to him in meetings, worried about scorn or criticism. So, they hold back sharing proactively, stifling innovation long-term. Alternatively, a gossipy colleague with subtle but consistent backhanded comments fuels rumours that strain trust and rapport between peers. People hesitate to collaborate lest they become the next target.

The ripple effects of just a few dysfunctional individuals and relationships can be far-reaching if not properly addressed. However mediating issues through open communication, manager facilitation, and conflict resolution protects corporate culture. Resetting boundaries also helps minimise interpersonal fallout, preventing decreased engagement, lost productivity, and turnover in the long run.

Recognising Difficult Behaviours

Pinpointing problematic workplace behaviours is the critical first step in controlling damage from toxic individuals. Look out for these common occurrences by difficult people at work:

–   Taking Credit: Co-workers who pass your ideas off as their own in front of leadership to take credit for positive results or curry political favour. For example, your peer Sam presents the customer retention idea you came up with together without acknowledgement, taking all the glory himself.

–   Passive Aggression: Backhanded compliments, purposeful inefficiencies when collaborating, reluctance to support team success yet no overt confrontation. For example, creative director Carla frequently makes subtle, doubting comments about your design work rather than constructive feedback all while maintaining a saccharine veneer.

–   Shirking Responsibility: Habitually making excuses to avoid undesirable tasks or duties, leaving more cumbersome work to peers. For instance, analyst Matt takes many conveniently timed smoke breaks whenever data compilation requests come up to avoid the grunt work.

While often not overtly confrontational on the surface, these behaviours breed resentment, friction, and a climate of distrust among colleagues over time. The implications spread beyond just the individuals involved to negatively impact unit morale and performance.

But once you’re aware of specific issues recurring, you can address them more objectively rather than reacting emotionally. This could mean direct communication, involving management, or formal mediation if appropriate depending on contexts and severity. However, meaningful progress begins with identifying and acknowledging problematic patterns as the vital first step.

Strategies For Managing Difficult Co-Workers

When faced with difficult personalities, react strategically rather than reflexively. Tailor your response to the specific behaviours and scenarios at hand. But in general, apply these proven tactics for dealing with difficult people at work by engaging constructively:

–   Listen Deeply First: Hear people out fully rather than interjecting your rebuttals or reactions upfront. Ask thoughtful questions to fully understand the context and reasons behind concerning mindsets. Then re-direct the conversation collaboratively back to solutions once you’ve established this listening foundation.

–   Empathise About Feelings (Not Actions): Seek any common ground possible in the person’s frustrations or motivations without necessarily endorsing harmful actions tied to them. “I understand feeling slighted even if how it came out impacted more people,” demonstrates empathy separated from approval. This builds connections crucial for defusing and redirecting negative behaviours.

–   Set Benevolent Boundaries: Calmly call out hurtful language or actions directly in real-time. But avoid making it personal to foster goodwill. “I want us all to thrive here but certain terms cross lines with that vision,” resets rules of engagement without attacks. Apply consistently to prevent enabling and needing to address pent-up issues later on.

–   Use Humour Skilfully When Appropriate: Light jokes in tense moments can temporarily ease stress levels just enough to shift the tone positively. But tread very carefully based on existing rapport and personalities at play. Irrational people or strait-laced managers may take wisecracks as patronising or unprofessional. Know your audience.

–   Practise Regular Self-Care: Protect your mental health by regularly decompressing through activities, relationships, or outlets completely separate from work. Difficult people shouldn’t hijack your whole state of being if you proactively fortify the other areas of life outside professional turmoil.

While no single approach works universally, combining compassion with direct communication, boundaries, and tactical support provides the best results long-term. With finesse, emotional intelligence, and strategic responses, you can train yourself to overcome problematic behaviours regardless of who you’re working alongside.

Conclusion

Stay vigilant in spotting toxic behaviours early before they further poison teams. Then respond calmly and consistently with a mix of empathy and boundaries to minimise fallout.

Rather than reacting emotionally when personalities inevitably clash, focus specifically on the tangible actions you can take – whether through one-on-one discussions, manager facilitation, or formal mediation if necessary. Seek mutual understanding whenever possible. And don’t forget that protecting your own mental health allows you to engage more constructively when dealing with difficult people at work.

It’s important to keep looking for new ways to improve your communication skills and your toolset for handling difficult emotional situations. At Impact Factory, we have a range of courses designed to help you feel more confident and better prepared to ensure that your team works harmoniously. Take a look at our courses and get in touch to talk to one of our team about how we can help you.

Further Reading

Conflict Management In Business – A guide to different styles of conflict management in the business environment.

Improve Communication – Top Ten Skills – Beyond conflict, this guide can help you to feel more confident communicating at work.

Group Dynamics – Learn more about the dynamics and relationships that go into making an effective team.

Personal Impact Course – This course helps you to develop your personal impact and how you can influence others.

Five Tactics For Dealing With Difficult People at Work