Delivering Bad News Confidently

Simple steps for calm and effective management of difficult situations

Delivering bad news can be extremely stressful because it’s hard to put our thoughts and feelings aside. Unfortunately, this has the potential to weaken our approach to delivering bad news, which can make a difficult situation worse. Most commonly, we experience a sense of dread about telling someone something we wouldn’t want to hear ourselves. But there are many other issues.

For example, we may believe the bad news is unjust for the person concerned. Expressing this won’t change the situation, but it may raise an expectation that you will try. That could give hope where there is none, which may simply mean you end up delivering bad news twice.

A potentially worse scenario is when we feel bad news is justified. Even if we try to control our thoughts and feelings, they can be expressed unconsciously in our tone of voice and body language. That puts us at risk of delivering bad news in a way that inadvertently incites conflict.

As you can imagine, preparation is the best way to minimise the risk of your thoughts and feelings compromising the situation. A few simple steps will ensure you focus solely on the person you are speaking to, and the difficult conversation you need to have.

Who is the Recipient?

We call it ‘bad news’ because something has happened that will cause difficulty for someone. Redundancy means finding new employment. Missing out on a promotion means continuing to do the same role for longer.

Always deliver bad news in the context of the recipient. Consider who you will be delivering bad news to, and the difficulty it will cause them. What are their professional circumstances and employment record with the organisation? Are there any personal circumstances you ought to take into account? Keeping this in mind will guide your preparation, particularly the way you phrase the bad news.

What is the Bad News?

Next, focus on the difficult messages themselves. These will be the one or two sentences that outline what has happened.

When delivering bad news, be clear and concise. Your instinct may be to soften the wording, but don’t fall into the trap of failing to communicate the full extent of the situation. Equally, you may feel the desire to dramatise the bad news as a sign of support. This can set up false hope that you will intervene to change the person’s situation, so try to be sympathetic but neutral.

Another instinct is to apologise, but this may not be helpful if you are in a line management or leadership role. Consider whether apologising undermines your authority, particularly if you are part of the decision-making team that led to the bad news.

How Will They React?

Having considered the person and the news they will be receiving, use your natural ability to empathise to imagine what their reaction will be. In effect, that means putting yourself in their position and delivering the bad news to yourself.

The trick is to visualise how it affects their life and the actions they will need to take as a result. They will almost certainly feel distressed. They may experience fear about what will happen to them. In some cases, they may also feel disgusted and angry. Humans can experience multiple emotions at the same time, so try to consider the full breadth of possibilities.

What is the Justification?

Any recipient of bad news will want justification for it. More than that, they may want to know why it is happening to them rather than other people. Gather the reasons and then focus on the strongest. You want to keep the reasoning as clear and concise as the bad news itself.

Avoid lengthy explanations, excessive detail and exaggeration as this may give the recipient something to pick apart, fight against or gain hope from. Equally, be wary about withholding information. There may be some confidential reasons why a difficult decision had to be made, but never hold something back that the person can probably discover for themselves.

While remaining sympathetic, your reasoning should be factual to ensure there is little room for argument. As much as possible, phrase the justification in a way that minimises the extent of negative reactions, particularly disgust and anger.

What is the Journey?

Lay out what the person can expect to happen now the bad news has been delivered. You want to give a clear account so there are no further surprises down the line. Being drip-fed bad news is often far more disorientating and upsetting than receiving it in one go.

Next, outline anything that may help the person going forward. What support can you provide? Are there services to help them, such as internal procedures or legal options? When delivering bad news, you want to sound as helpful and supportive as possible.

What Will They Ask?

Delivering bad news clearly and concisely can reduce the number of questions that the recipient will have. Less questions can be a good sign because it means you provided factual, undeniable justification for what has happened.

Nevertheless, the person will almost certainly have questions, so try to anticipate them so you can deliver clear and concise answers. Ideally, you want the bad news to be delivered in one session only. If you need to go away and find further information, it gives the recipient hope that the bad news can be reversed.

What Can You Refine?

Following the above steps will give you a good script for delivering bad news. However, it’s worth giving it a final pass to see if you can refine anything. Remember that wordiness provides room for misinterpretation and conflict, so aim for brevity. Craft sentences that convey a great deal of information using the minimum amount of wording.

Finally, work through the script to highlight the key parts and try to commit them to memory. You can also make a few notes to use as prompts. This ensures your interaction with the person feels natural.

Having undertaken this preparation, you will feel much more confident about delivering bad news calmly and effectively.